Corrupted Wishes game

L

Lythand

Guest
Granted, Spiderman offeres to be a guinnea pig for a new Mountain Dew Kick in the Cherries Code Red commercial where you will attempt to set a world record for groin kicks. While holding a Mountain Dew Code red, you attempt to make your first kick. As you do you slip on some previous spilt Mountain dew, fall off the stage, break your neck and are paralyzed. Before anyone can come to your rescue, you manage to drown in the soda spilling from the can you were holding.


I wish to be the benficiary of Tabascoes law suit, by his family, against Pepsico for the death of Tabasco filming the Code red commercial.
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
GRANTED! You and your unicycle drave across the country, stopping at every town and encourage small children to shove porcupines into small orifices on your body. The authorities discover this and arrest you, sentencing you to 215 consecutive life sentences for being a wierdo and for failing to realize that you need to give Ransac money. While in jail, you are shanked to death......... by a walnut.


I wish for the meteors to come back



Ransac, cpa trash man
 
Oversoul

Oversoul

The Tentacled One
Granted, but the meteors that come back are very ancient meteors that do not smash things. Instead, they fly around and taunt you--and only you.

I wish Ransac knew what a drave REALLY is.
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
Granted! Ransac searches the internet for drave and discovers an Austrian river. Ransac gets upset and runs to Oversoul's house and forces him to eat pigeon crap to satisfy his pain.

I wish that I knew what Oversoul thought a drave was


Ransac, cpa trash man
 
Oversoul

Oversoul

The Tentacled One
Granted, Oversoul ties you to a chair with a device holding your eyelids open (just like in "A Clockwork Orange") and forces you to watch a screen that shows you every word in the Oxford English Dictionary. One of them is "drave."

I wish for the most corruptable wish ever.
 
T

Tabasco

Guest
Granted, Oversoul goes over to Ransac's house while he is in the bathroom, he waits for Ransac to open the door then delivers a mind-numbing kick to Ransac's groin

I wish Ransac would perform a better search on the winnarnet.

Drave

Drave is an archaic or obsolete past tense form from Early Modern English.

Kinda like ****->Shat
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
Granted! Ransac instead searches for porn on the internet. While searching for porn, he notices a website to control meteors. He clicks on the site and a meteor lands on Oversoul..... and then one lands on Tabasco...... then one on HOUTS..... then one on all of the Nightstalkers..... and for the hell of it, one on Spidey too.

I wish everyone would be happy about meteors landing on them

:D


Ransac, cpa trash man
 
B

BigBlue

Guest
Granted - Everyone IS happy to have a meteor land on their head, because it is the best luck charm ever. Of course you never have one land on your head, so you are condemned to a life of really bad luck - compounded by the fact that your only revenge is giving others good luck by bombarding them with meteors, making your misery even worse.

I wish for 1 million animated feathers to torment Ransac.
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
GRANTED! 1 million animated feathers are given to you. Unfortunately, each feather is controlled by a different computer. These computers are dropped on you, crushing you into splattered splat.

I wish for a Boba Fett action figure!


Ransac, cpa trash man
 
T

Tabasco

Guest
Granted, A Boba Fett action figure appears before you, then - wait a second the figure points its guns at you and they kill you - guess you should've made sure you were getting an inatimate action figure.

I wish Groin Loreholder's Pony kicked Mr. Loreholder in the Groin.
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
Granted! Too bad the state legally changed your name to "Tabasco Loreholder". The pony not out kicks you in the groin, but the rips your genitalia off in the process.

I wish that everybody realized that Dwarven Pony was the best magic card in the world!!!!!!!


Ransac, cpa trash man
 
Oversoul

Oversoul

The Tentacled One
You stumble across a seemingly obvious but previously unrecognized use for Dwarven Pony that makes it the strongest creature in the game. WotC has you assassinated for revealing its greatest secret.

I wish to be assassinated.
 
B

BigBlue

Guest
Granted - however just like in the day of the Jackal, the Jackal misses you. Unfortunately, he hits the love of your life, so now you must endure the rest of your life lonely and sad because not only were you not assassinated, your love was.

I wish I didn't have all these damn feathers antagonizing me.
 
R

reco5151216

Guest
Granted....Each and every feather turns into a real life pop up who's close bottom you just can't reach.

I wish for a faster internet connection!
 
Oversoul

Oversoul

The Tentacled One
Here's a new DS3 line. You use it and now your internet connection is faster than ever. You will soon discover that I stole this expensive hardware from BigBlue, who hunts you down and tortures you to death with feathers when he finds you.

I want to rock and roll all night and party every day.
 
T

Tabasco

Guest
Granted. You become the lead singer of the new rock band, "Radioactive Breakfast"

You throw a party to celebrate your first album and one of the females gets naughty with you in a bedroom. The next day you feel horrible, you go to the doctor and find out that you have herpes syphilis, gonorrhea, and AIDS, and that you only have 5 minute left to live before they devour you body. Oh well a small price to pay for rock stardom...I guess everyone doesn't know what it is like to party like a rock star.

I wish I had a loudspeaker to annouce to the world, "After I am done sticking this hot poker up my oink I am going to go chop my male parts off!!!"**

**=quoted from a George Carlin HBO special
 
B

BigBlue

Guest
Granted - At a loud party, there is a pause in the discussion and it get's just quiet enough for everyone to hear you exclaim those famous words. One individual in particular finds your words comforting. When you go to leave the party, you are grabbed from behind and drugged. You wake up, well aware that the masked individual in front of you is sharpening his cleaver, while a poker rests in a bed of coals... If only you could see who is behind the mask...

I wish Tabasco knew who had teabagged him and is now ready to fulfill his wish.
 
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