Corrupted Wishes game

O

orgg

Guest
Granted! You get a bag that, while phisically small, has a demensional quark in its top to be effectivly bottomless, with an endless supply of potato chips. As you walk down the street munching the chips, Lythand returns from the future in his time machine with the winning lotto numbers and appears directly on top of you. Two unstable items (the potato chips and the Flux Capacitor, not Lythand and Ransac) are merged as one, and cause a gigantic explosion that levels half of the northern portion of the Southern United States.

I wish they'd hurry up and release the Weird Al Show on DVD.
 
L

Lythand

Guest
Granted, However due to new Anti Piracy laws, the new technology that is incorperated into your DVD to keep you from burning it, also prevents you from playing it on any current DVD players. It will be 5 more years before a compatable DVD player hits the market.

I wish I had a DVD player to sell to the Orgg to watch the Weird Al DVD's
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
Granted! You foolishly make it out of your organs and die minutes after you sell it to theorgg.

I wish theorgg would wash his breechcloth.


Ransac, cpa trash man
 
D

dwarven_anarchist

Guest
Granted. The only problem is, you grant the wishes instead of making them for the rest of your life.

I wish to be the greatest bassist in the state of New York!
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
Granted. The entire state of New York is swallowed into the earth, except for the small section you're sitting on. You have no food or water, or a bass for that matter, but you're definitely the greatest bassist in the state now.

I wish for a can of peas

Ransac, cpa trash man
 
B

BigBlue

Guest
Granted - In fact it's granted a million times over. You are suddenly bombarded by 1 million tiny cans of pea (there's actually only one pea inside each can). You think you are ok, if bruised, until a meteor falls on your head which cracks open on your thick skull revealing it's potato chips in the center. Then, in an act of random violence, Sprout (the Green Giants sidekick), squishes you for stealing all the peas.

I wish for nothing.
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
Granted! You are in possession of the nothing. However, this sparks the "Off-Topic Battle Over Nothing!!!!!!!" combatants to relapse back into killing over it. You are sucked into another universe to be ripped to shreds by the #versouls, while Oversoul is somehow in the drive-thru at Checkers and Ransac uses another Terminate on Theorgg. And, during all of this, William, the cyber-bacon, is still sizzling.

I wish that people would go back and read the thread on how William, the cyber-bacon, came to be.


Ransac, cpa trash man
 
Oversoul

Oversoul

The Tentacled One
So many people go and read that thread that William becomes a famous internet "meme." After seeing him used by so many 12-year-old boys, you become disgusted and regret ever making such a wish.

I wish I were an Oscar Meyer weiner.
 
B

BigBlue

Guest
Granted. That is just plain corrupt enough on it's own merit that I don't have to embelish it...

I wish there really was no place like home.
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
Granted. "home" for you becomes a worm-, flea, and disease-infested slum with bums urinating on your lawn and the basement eats and deficates out local cats. You are tormented by the howling noises that keep you awake every night. There is truly, really no place like it.

I wish that everyone had 15 toes.


Ransac, cpa trash man
 
T

Tabasco

Guest
Granted- although everyone already has 15 toes...20 to be exact so your wish is a bit pointless

I wish Ransac could count toes before wishing his wish.
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
Granted! Ransac counts toes...................... and a meteor lands on you.


I wish people had only 15 toes.


Ransac, cpa trash man
 
T

Tabasco

Guest
Granted-the entire population of Earth now shares a total of 15 toes. Unfortunately now no one can walk and everyone now wants Ransac's flesh.

I wish Ransac would stop pissing the people of the would off
 
Oversoul

Oversoul

The Tentacled One
"The people of the would" don't even exist. You just wasted a wish on nothing.

I wish I'd wasted this wish on nothing.
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
Granted! You wasted the wish on making Ransac happy by giving him a free meal (musicians love those). This pisses off the general populace so much that they stab your eyes out. Why did that piss off the general populace so much? I dunno. YOU'RE the one who wasted the wish!

I wish I knew WHY that pissed off the general populace so much


Ransac, cpa trash man
 
E

EricBess

Guest
Granted. You suddenly become one of the general populace and you understand perfectly. However, along with this, you are now one of the mindless horde. Your choice :(

I wish my wish had something to do with the general populace
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
Granted! It does, yet does nothing to appease the general populace, who catch you and cook you alive.

I wish that I had my own theme music.


Ransac, cpa trash man
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top