Corrupted Wishes game

[Oversoul]

Granted. Some people get together and make it their mission to ensure that you are always happy. Your junk mail is replaced with checks. When you stub your toe next to the mailbox, you become angry, and your fans tranquilize you and keep you in a constantly drugged state to maintain your happiness until you die.

I wish for music!

 

[Lythand]

Granted, you get all the music you can handle. How ever you can't hndle much because its Polka Music.

I wish for the return of the McDLT

 

[Oversoul]

It returns, whatever it is. And you die.

I wish I knew what Lythand's wish meant.

 

[BigBlue]

Granted... The McDLT was a McDonald's burger which came out in the 80's. It's main claim to fame was that it kept the "hot side hot & the cold side cold". It faced complaints from environmentalists because the packaging (styrofoam - as were most of their burger containers at the time), was extravagant. Unfortunately for you, this knowledge does not enrich your life, in fact it pains you since it awakens a passion in you to try a McDLT, which you can no longer have. You begin a hunger strike at your local McDonalds hoping for them to return the burger. A month later, you die of hunger, never having tasted the beauty of a burger which keeps the hot side hot, and the cold side cold...

I wish I hadn't tasted that beautiful burger myself, because I also crave that burger . . . or not...

 

[Oversoul]

Granted. Someone replaces your first McDLT with a bomb. You open the container and the blast destroys your tastebuds along with most of your face.

I wish for the destruction of all hamburgers.

Wow, I remember some stupid thing about a food product that kept "the hot side hot and the cold side cold." Did this ad campaign continue into the early 90's? Or maybe I somehow saw a commercial for it at some point after the product itself was long gone. I mean, I was born in 1985, so I doubt I'd remember something like that from the 80's unless it was 1988 or later...

 

[Tabasco]

Granted. Although then McD's would collapse and people would lose weight and we would no longer be an obese nation. Are we really ready to live like healthy people?

I wish I knew where all the Starcraft discs go.

Talk to anyone on the planet that bought Starcraft, they install it and put the CD back into its case, but when they delete it from their computer and try to reinstall to play the game again it is gone, I am willing to bet no one has their original Starcraft disc. Sure they have the expansion disc, but that doesn't work on its own, you need to have the original installed first before you can load the expansion. Somewhere there must be a creature or black hole which consumes Starcraft discs

 

[Oversoul]

The members of the CPA decide to test their new invention: the shrink ray. They're pretty sure it will work because it looks almost exactly like the one from "Honey, I Shrunk the Kids." But they need to test it anyway. So they decide to test it on the first person who walks in the door. The Orgg opens the door, but no one sees you get caught by the ray, so they all assume the machine failed. Since you are so tiny, you seek shelter and eventually rest on what you fail to realize is a Starcraft disc. When its owner, who is certainly not Mooseman, uninstalls the game and wants to find his disc, you fall into the demon-portal with the disc and find yourself in Hell. Also, you are still very tiny.

I wish for a shrink ray thingy...

 

[Lythand]

Granted, how ever it did not come with intructions. When trying to figure out how to use the Shrinkray thingy, you accidently Shrink your thingy, hence why they call it the Shrinkray thingy.and are unable to get a date for the rest of your life.

I wish I has a Flat Panel monitor that spaned from east coast to west coast so I could play a giant size version of Super Mario Brothers.

 

[BigBlue]

Granted - however the only way you can see your large screen is from orbit. Unfortunately, Oversoul's new Shrink Ray thingy looks identical to a game controller, and you inadvertantly took it instead of your regular controller. So now, you are stuck in space with a lifetime supply of pill based protein packs, a tiny thingy, and no controller for your game - so you have to stare at the opening screen for the rest of your days...

I wish someone else made this wish, so I don't have to endure it's corruption.

 

[Tabasco]

Granted, Abe Lincoln busted out of his grave and his band of zombies along with himself wished the corrupted wish and now they are walking the earth.

I wish for an army equipped with shotguns and flamethrowers to fight off the zombies and save civilization.

 

[Oversoul]

Granted. You get the army and save civilization. You'll soon find out why saving civilization wasn't all that great...

I wish something really bad would happen to the person who corrupts this wish.

 

[Ransac]

Granted! Ransac's toast burns to a crisp while typing this post. Ransac really, really wanted that toast and was looking forward to eating it. He goes through serious depression for the next 30 minutes....... oh yeah! That bread for the toast was made out of the flesh of Oversoul, whom Ransac had killed the night before.

I wish for billions of green M&M's


Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[Tabasco]

Granted, unfortunately you didn't wish where they should be put and they all simultaniously appear in your appendix, which promptly bursts and you die!

the other M&M's are floating in space on a meteor on its way to earth, which was redirected by the sudden appearance of the above mentions M&M's

I wish I were a ninja.

 

[Ransac]

GRANTED! You're a very badly trained ninja and are killed on your first mission...... by a toddler..... who stuck a.... well, it's too gruesome to explain.

I wish that Teferi would come back to the CPA


Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[Oversoul]

Teferi returns and promptly explains to you that human flesh can't really be used to make bread. You lament this newfound knowledge so much that your appendix bursts.

I wish for sand.

 

[Tabasco]

Granted, however the sand is from Gaara's gourd he promptly makes the sand perform the sand ninjitsu "sand coffin" and it kills you!

*See attachment for Gaara reference*

I wish people would realize that this game never turns out the way they want it to.

 

[Oversoul]

Everyone already realized that except for Oversoul. They were playing the game anyway out of boredom. You just wasted your wish on giving trivial knowledge to one poor fool. You probably should have used it for something more important, like not getting stomach cancer...

I wish I didn't know what to wish for.

 

[Lythand]

Granted!. You manage to suffer from a stage to temporary irriversable brain damage. Its irriversable, but temporary. And during this time of insanity you are unable to make wishes. However during this time you are found lurking the streets nakes screeming things like " I twiddled my bone flute"and "I want your howling Mine" . For those who don't play Magic, this seems like vulger act and you are locked in a loony bin. While there you befriend a guy named Beufort who thinks he is the Joker in Arkham Asylum and you are Batman.

I wish I owned the Oscar Meyer Weiner mobile to be able to drave across the country

 

[Ransac]

After searching for the definition of the verb "drave" on dictionary.com, I found no verb definitions and will hence create my own.

GRANTED! You and your Oscar Meyer Weiner-mobile drave across the country, stopping at every town and encourage small children to shove porcupines into small orifices on your body. The authorities discover this and arrest you, sentencing you to 215 consecutive life sentences for being a wierdo and for failing to realize that it is your turn to draft. While in jail, you are shanked to death......... by a walnut.


I wish that Cassius Clay didn't read poetry....... that was the worst album ever.


Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[Tabasco]

Granted! Cassius Clay become illiterate and begins to beat his immediate familiy members because of his sudden inability.

I wish I could kick someone in the groin until we established a new world record for most consecutive kicks to the groin by another person.