Corrupted Wishes game

[Oversoul]

They build a time machine and go back to before you corrupted his wish, then kill you before you can do so, thereby saving Rokapoke from certain death.

I wish I knew how they killed Ransac.

 

[BigBlue]

Granted!

They took you with them in the time machine, tore you limb from limb once you got there, then clubbed him to death with your bloody arms and legs. They fed the rest of you to his well-paddled goat.

I wish I had a time machine.

 

[Mooseman]

Granted, unfortunately for you, all it does is create more time for you to work and be annoyed by people on this board....... Did you really think you could go backward or forward in time?????? Silly rabbit.....

I wish I could go sideways in time and space.

 

[BigBlue]

Granted!

A Meteor comes crashing down, you deftly sidestep it, and realize in the process you moved sideways and time moved with you. While you're disappointed, at least your safe... for now.

I wish Mooseman's wish results hadn't been so lackluster.

 

[Oversoul]

I make modifications to your time machine, allowing it to work the way you actually wanted it to. Then I butcher you and bake you into a meat pie. I go back in time to before you corrupted Mooseman's wish and I pie him in the face with you. His wish actually ends up not being granted at all, but the results definitely weren't lackluster. I mean, he has chunks of your kidneys sliding down his face. That's like the antithesis of lackluster.

I wish someone would grant poor Mooseman's wish.

 

[Ransac]

ggggrrrrrrRRRRANTED!!!!!!!!! That someone is you, who has to grant not just his prior wish, but ALL of his sick, sadistic wishes..... many of them involve you in a tu-tu.

I wish for Spiderman to get a haircut.

Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[rokapoke]

Granted! But, as luck would have it, you are the only person working at the salon when Spidey comes in for his annual bikini wax.

I wish I could un-imagine that!

 

[turgy22]

Granted! The image of Spiderman getting a bikini wax from Ransac is cleared from your head and replaced with the image of Ransac getting a bikini wax from Spiderman.

I wish for the 49ers to win the Super Bowl this year.

 

[Ransac]

Granted! The 49ers enter the "Whose fan has the Messiest Toilet" Sweepstakes, selecting you after you clearly dominated the application procedure. They win 1st prize, a toilet with the word Super on it dubbed "the Super Bowl." You weren't there to help the award, as you drowned in said toilet.

I wish that both the Pats and the Giants would lose Super Bowl 46.


Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[Mooseman]

Granted! Both teams are disqualified for being boring and having inbred fans. Instead the Ravens and Steelers will play in the Super Bowl, while Ransac is forced to watch all of Tom Brady's interviews.

I wish that the NHL was on a real station.

 

[Killer Joe]

Granted! However their times shown on network TV have been moved to air after all the reality shows are done putting everyone to sleep.

I wish the GOP would produce somebody who could actually BEAT Obama in the general election.

 

[turgy22]

Granted! An intelligent and honest conservative enters the race and instantly polls better than Obama in a head-to-head national election. However, being intelligent and honest means he has no chance of winning the Republican primary.

I wish my dog would stop eating poop.

 

[Ransac]

Granted! He doesn't get a chance to when you hog all of it yourself!

I wish that Dark Ascension didn't look like such a terrible set.

Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[rokapoke]

Granted! Stores around the world will be placing it on the shelves between packs of Homelands and Fallen Empires!

I wish that the spring semester was over already.

 

[Killer Joe]

Granted! However, your final was yesterday and you missed it so now you have to drop out of school and work the street corner as a Homeless Hoe.

I wish I could play Magic this Saturday.

 

[Oversoul]

You go one-on-one against Magic Johnson. You win! He doesn't want the world to know about this defeat, so he shoots you in the face with a shotgun.

I wish for infinite wishes?

 

[Mooseman]

Granted, but everyone must be about the Steelers winning the Super Bowl.

I wish Playing games on the CPA message board paid my bills.