A new era dawns in the Battle Arena... not really, but Ransac stole your pants... :D

[Ransac]

*Ransac stares at the gnome fervently attacking Killer Joe.*

It's kinda like watching a Jack Russell Terrier....... with rabies....... and using a tenor as a club.

*Ransac snaps his fingers. Grog is now wearing black clothing that is 18 sizes too small.*

I love doing that.



Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[Budget Player Cadet]

*Grog watches the clothes rip and thanks his copper gnome ancestors. Then he wonders how you even get 18 sizes too small with a gnome. Then his arms break off at the shoulders with a ceramic-esque crack and he curses his clay ancestors.*
Thank god for Super Glue. The bad news: I can't afford to buy it. Stupid Taxes!

 

[Killer Joe]

Translation: I need some advil!

 

[Budget Player Cadet]

*Grog attempts to fuse his arms back on using the flaming, sticky, goblin turds. How he does this without use of his arms is better left unsaid.*

 

[Budget Player Cadet]

*Grog wanders around, wondering where the heck everyone else has been for the last couple of hours. After falling victim to extreme boredom, he falls asleep in spite of the wailing tenors around him*

*IS THERE ANYBODY OUT THERE? In the meanwhile, Grog kills a few hundred tenors.*

 

[Ransac]

Like the thread games, these "fights" typically take some time. We are from all over the world and have different time schedules. I personally have an inconsistent performance/school schedule.

Additionally, we're gonna need to discuss these double postings of yours. We typically frown upon that. Just be patient. We'll be back to destroy. In the meantime.

*Ransac continues to bash KJ with his lead rabbit.*

Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[Budget Player Cadet]

Sorry, I was bored. It's like a series, you know? I read this and immediately thought, this is genius. So I'm always waiting on the next installment. Sorry about the doubly posting.

 

[Ransac]

If you're bored, check out this previous battle. Longest battle in the Battle Arena and my personal favorite.

Just don't necro-thread it.


Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[Budget Player Cadet]

*BudgetGrog feels like Ransac is annoying, and tinkers the tenor into a loxodon warha-oh wait, he can't, he's too poor to be able to afford it. He tinkers the tenor into a umezawa's ji-GRRRR!!!! He tinkers the tenor into a skullclamp, which turns out to be a total failure-nothing in his skull to clamp.*

 

[Ransac]

*Ransac notices the gnome twitching and squeeking about something, then punts him 15 yards into another pile of sticky goblin turds.*


Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[Budget Player Cadet]

*Now BudgetGrog is angry. He is officially angry. He calls upon the first plague of Ransac! Unfortunately, he has no idea how to speak an arcanic language, what the curse does, or what the heck it is.*

 

[Killer Joe]

*KJ, desperately trying to fight off a lead rabbit, attempts to use an ancient weapon once used on the boards*

----------> Ransac

 

[Ransac]

*Ransac looks at Grog spazzing out over trying to summon the plague, which amuses him. Ransac relents and decides to release the first plague of Ransac again (hoping that Oversoul doesn't alert the board again). Millions of weasels begin to stampede toward the battlegroud.*


Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[Budget Player Cadet]

*Grog laughs triumphantly as he feels the arcane mights in motion. Then he remembers that weasels are shoulder hight on him, and that he is allergic to weasel fur. He calls on the only mass destruction article cheap enough for him, removing two memories in his head from the game, and plays sunscour. His I.Q. sinks to -354,196.*

 

[Ransac]

*Ransac, upsets that the plague has been thwarted, casts Animate Land on a nearby Forest and Flings it at Grog.*

Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[Killer Joe]

Doesn't this thing WORK!?!

-----------> Ransac

 

[Ransac]

*Ransac has no clue what KJ is babbling about, but rationalizes that he must be delusional from the repeating bashing from lead rabbit he has recieved.*

Poor fool....


*Ransac Animate Lands a Spinerock Knoll and flings it at KJ.*


Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[Budget Player Cadet]

*Grog looks at the land coming at him and decides to do what any budget player would do: look in a price guide to find out if wild ricochet is budget. After seeing the 1$ seal on it, he hastily casts wild ricochet and targets KJ and Ransac with the forest. He is amused as a second forest pops into existence, and asks himself if animate land is budget.*

 

[Ransac]

*Ransac begrudingly replies "It's an uncommon from Nemesis..... yes, it's budget."*


Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[Budget Player Cadet]

Wonderful!
*Grog tinkers his useless skullclamp into a particularly pointy darksteel citadel. Unfortunately, he loses a large part of what was left of his brain in the process. He attempts to animate the citadel, and realizes that he had forgotten the foundation. His spell is disrupted as it falls on him. And on top of it, the Vintage judge pops into existence and rips up his remaining 135675867 tinkers.*