Hey Jackal!

[The Magic Jackal]

Yes my killing spree is over, unless someone really pisses me off. So what will i do now that the killing spree is over? Well, i'm currently working out the rules for a similar "free for all tag" game. Watch for it in the battle arena, coming soon!

Things are going to get interesting around here.

 

[Istanbul]

Not exactly. I simply don't think that such a putrescent pile of elephant shit warrants any kind of real effort on my behalf. I don't have to make Chaos Turtle look stupid; all I have to do is let him talk, and he'll do it for me.

As for you, FoundationOfRiptide, if you would stop licking the rancid cheese from between your mother's toes long enough to try to understand multisyllabic words (a stretch, I know), you might realize that in every exchange, I've come out drastically superior to my...opponent? No. I should say 'practice dummy', but that would imply that talking with that abyssmally inept heap of roach genitals was having some positive effect on my life.

But by all means, continue to talk. It amuses me, in the same way that watching Beavis and Butthead amused me; sometimes, people are stupid enough to be funny despite their inanity.

 

[Multani]

It\'s funny how an a$$holes like Istanbul can be so arrogant. Istanbul you need a life, so go get one.
The only thing I see you do around here is bully people around. Pick on someone your own size.
So stop harassing Chaos Turtle.
This message will probably
bring some wimpy rebuttal from you
So come on
Bring it on!!!

\"To make peace with the forest, make peace with me.\"
-Multani to Urza

 

[Istanbul]

Hey, it\\'s not MY fault that people like you are so wretched and pathetic, Multani. Oh, by the way, great name. Why not just call yourself \\'Urza\\' or \\'Richard Garfield\\' or something else with similar underpinnings of originality?

...oh, sorry. I forgot. Sarcasm will fly over your head so fast that it\\'ll burn your hair.

As for Chaos Turtle...he brought his feeble attempt at insults to the board, I simply made him my dirty little bitch by laying the verbal smackdown until he cried like a little girl.

And yes, I\\'m sure you\\'re going to take offense to this, and I\\'m sure you\\'re going to calling me arrogant. Just remember, I have no control over how stupid you are, and it only seems like I\\'m looking down on you because you have to crane your thick neck so far to look up and see me.

Get a life. Get two, and kill one.

(BTW, out-of-rant question: does anyone else get a / put with every apostrophe?)

[Edited by Istanbul on April 23rd, 2000 at 09:32 PM]

 

[Multani]

Your pathetic insults simply bounce off me.
I seem to always see you telling someone that they
are stupid.
Maybe you do this because you know that you are
mentally retarded and making other people seem dumb
helps ease that fact.
By the way, did I mention that your insults almost always
involve someone being stupid?
Put some more variety! At least that way your insults will be worth rebutting.
So do everyone a favor and go suck someones ass.

-------------------------------------------

"To make peace with the forest make, peace with me."
-Multani to Urza

 

[theorgg]

I'm rubber, your glue.
everything that gets blown out of my nose sticks to you!

 

[Istanbul]

I really should have expected my insults to bounce off of you; it\'s really rather pointless to insult someone without the facilities to understand what you\'re saying, but you make such a tempting target that I just couldn\'t resist.

As for me being mentally retarded...yes, of course! You sure got me there. That must be why I\'m a member of Student Council and the Honor Society in college, while your most recent accomplishment is remembering that shoes go on your FEET.

What else do I have to insult you on? Your looks? Thank all the gods, I can\'t see you. (I would surely go into convulsions.) I can\'t make fun of your voice, because I can\'t hear you. Of course, I can picture the shrill nasal whine that emanates from your perpetually-congested sinuses, but thinking about you too long tends to give me a nasty facial tic. All I know about you is what you post, what comes from the festering lump of monkey shit that you have the temerity to call a brain.

How do you expect me not to take aim at such an obvious target?

 

[Multani]

Look Istanbul, I don't give a shit what you think of me.
It's sad that a person in an honor society would have nothing
better to do than go around calling other people retards.
In a way you are retarded. A normal person would see his own limitations and not go around boasting their own meager achievements.
I'm done arguing with a gay asshole like you.
Go ahead, insult me all you want.
You'll be wasting your time.

"To make peace with the forest, make peace with me."
-Multani to Urza

 

[Istanbul]

Of course you don't care what I think of you! If you did, your pathetically fragile ego would suffer a truly fatal blow, and you'd be even further revealed as the snivelling, whiny punk that you really are.
And don't worry about me, I have plenty of things to do other than calling you retarded...doing that just happens to be the first thing that comes to mind every time I see one of your posts.
And you shouldn't assume so much; I know full well that I can't read one of your posts without snickering derisively, and that I couldn't possibly sink down to a level where you could understand me. Darn this multisyllabic vocabulary of mine!
Oooh! Call me a 'gay asshole'! Wow! Well, seeing as how I'm neither a sphincter nor homosexual, your insult kinda falls flat on the ground and twitches like one of your 'special hamsters' after one of your glory sessions, doesn't it?

Hell, I've been wasting my time on you so far, why not continue?

Oh, and read my .sig file, cretin.

[edit: Ed here - should fix the problem]

 

[Istanbul]

Glorious. Houston, we have a problem...

 

[Ed Sullivan]

Sorry, off topic here, but Istanbul, did you type in the HTML codes, or did the message board stuff do that?

test

 

[Istanbul]

The message board stuff did that. I don't even know HTML code. (That's why I said we had a problem.)

And hey, you RUN this thing, you don't have to apologize for being off-topic.

 

[Istanbul]

One, two, three...

 

[Istanbul]

Looks like none of you little pansy-ass pillow-biters have the cajones to take me on anymore, seeing as how the last counter-attack (if you can call it that) was over two days ago.

I guess this means I come out on top of this one. Still, I have to thank Chaos_Turtle for his laughable attempt to triumph over me, and Multani for being that unintentional kind of funny.

And if any of you anus-licking buttgrabbers feel like you could drag yourself away from getting reamed by Daddy long enough to conceivably have something to say to me, please, do so. I'd welcome the challenge, if you can call it that.

 

[Apollo]

Yay! I survived the massacre (as far as I know)!

Multani: it's the Battle Arena. He's just having some fun, calm down. Everybody needs to go wacko every once a while. This is where they do it. Like the sig says, don't take him seriously. No one wants bad blood between members.

Apollo

 

[Istanbul]

I tried to explain that to the poor lad, but I kept slipping into words with more than two syllables. Maybe you'll manage to get through to him, who knows!

 

[Ophidian]

[me]chucks a goblin grenade at Istanbul[/me]

It's made out of real goblin, which is (almost) more putrid than the pathetic stench of an overmentalized psychophobic infatessimile speck of wurm crap that is Istanbul's brain.

Multisyllable? Bring it on.

Incomprehensible? Bring it on.

Retarded? Stay at home.

I don't have to hide behind a thesaurus to make people tremble. I tell it like it is.

BIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAATCCCCHHH! bwahahahahahaha!

 

[Istanbul]

*deadpan* I cannot possibly express to you how intimidated I am by your faux Goblin Grenade. Or were you attempting to make me laugh with your take on the old Addams Family reference, re: lemonade? You see, none of what I'VE been saying is derivative. Mind you, I can see how you might want to draw off of other sources, obviously lacking the facilities to make up anything original on your own.

Multisyllable? Yes, thank you. Incomprehensible? Only to you, chumly, and only because you were busy trying to get into trouble so you could get spanked while other people were learning things in school. Retarded? Name yourself after a Magic creature! See how well it's worked for Ophidian and Multani?

I don't hide behind a thesaurus, you anti-intellectual defect. I use words I actually KNOW (I know, the idea of not having to look words up is anathema to you, but try to follow me) to verbally bludgeon my opponents into submission. Witness one savagely beaten Ophidian.

BTW, you misspelled 'infinitessimal'. Badly.

Biaaaatch.

 

[Ophidian]

ROTFLMAO!!!!

I do appreciate all of the kind words you had to say about me. But seriously, the addams family? Only in your house. Intellectual defect? No, sorry, the only defect I have is I am too nice to carry on until I see you fragile little ego pop like the zit you are. Your lifeless imagination must scour your archive of beavis and butthead in order to come up with something even remotely scary. I pity you, my friend, you spend so much time carrying on about vocabulary and such, but does it really even matter when your on the floor weeping because of 'big words'? Nope, didn't think so. I would gladly come at you with my prime material, but what fun is a one-sided fight? I refuse to engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed man. And with this, I shall depart to college, where the smart get smarter. And Istanbull, just remember who's daddy.

Oh, BTW, I want to use your photo for a new ad campaign I am designing for my advocacy group "Neuter the Stupid". I could have your face on every billboard in town. I don't know if that would be good or bad, now that I think about it...

Oh, and another thing. Biaaaaaaatch!

 

[Istanbul]

Allow me to disassemble your wretched little defense bit by bit.

Yes, the Addams Family. The joke was originally made regarding lemonade...but then, I'm not surprised that even you don't know where your lame jokes come from.

Too nice to pop my ego? News flash, Einstein. This isn't the play-nice-with-others board. I suspect something more along the lines of inadequacy on your part.

...on this next part, you lose me. On the floor weeping because of 'big words', which only seem big to you because of your pathetically unworthy command of the language? Scouring my archive of Beavis and Butthead?

You win. I can't return fire against something that makes so little sense. You might as well accuse me of being an insensate orange peel; it's about as relevant and cohesive, and equally unworthy of a response.

Battle of wits with an unarmed man...referencing the Addams Family movie...face on a billboard...tell me, are you CAPABLE of original thought? Are you just holding back on using the creativity you have cleverly hidden? Or are you actually bringing your full mental faculties to bear (a concept which I find both pitiful and probable)?

Oh, and just so you know...calling someone 'Biaaaatch' just makes you end an otherwise brainless post with an even more inane catchphrase, one that went out of vogue with platform shoes and afros. I used it on you to shove your own ludicrous words back at you, but apparently, you've failed to see just how stupid they make you look.